Unexpected Places.

      So I have been a terrible blogger......seeing as I have not posted since September, whoops. Well I figured I would write a little today. I have lived here for over six months now, which is absolutely crazy. Thinking about where my life was a year ago and not believing that was a year ago. It seems daunting to write an update from September, so I'm not. Though, I will say that I have experienced a lot of grace, challenge, pain, joy, confusion and purpose in these last six months. In the many emotions come many questions, some that have been beautifully answered and some that I will indefinitely be left in the dark about. A common question centers around what I am actually doing here: teaching first grade. Let me first say that it has been good. Real good. That good is filled with tastes of failure and grace. I'll be the first one to say, I royally had no idea what I was doing when I started teaching five months ago. All things first grade, or elementary school rather, were foreign to me. Heck, I still don't really know what I am doing...but that's where that word grace comes in and I experience it on the daily :). I feel inadequate, frustrated, and frankly dumb many days when it comes to teaching my little ones. There is still much I don't know, but one thing I do know is how to welcome the Holy Spirit in my classroom. There have been a handful of moments in my room in the last month or so where He has showed up and it has been beautifully humbling. I am confident He has me in position not because I am good at teaching reading or have super behavior management skills (cause I'm not and I don't), but to allow a space for Him to show up and pour His Spirit out on my students. Now, I will say before coming here, I had never worked with young kids and never desired to. I am passionate about seeing people come to experience the Lord actively move and work in their lives and frankly I didn't really believe He did with young kids at the same level I saw in teenagers and young adults. It sounds ignorant of me, but that is how I honestly felt, the concept was foreign to me. Wellllll, lets just say that belief has been shattered in a million beautiful pieces. Here is one example of that:   
       Last week, one of my students was visibly upset and he told me that his grandfather is dying. We had about 20 minutes between a special and Spanish class so I decided to bring all the students to the carpet and allow this student to share with the class why he was so upset. As he shared the reason for his tears, every student sat silently listening to him, and silence never happens in my classroom. As he spoke, the class inched their way forward and embraced him. The tears began to flow from their eyes and from mine. A handful of students began to share their stories of loss and I was able to share how I lost my grandmother at their very age. I asked if anyone would be willing to pray over this situation and a handful of hands went up; my classroom transformed into a prayer room. I listened to the the simple and genuine prayers of seven year old and I witnessed my students on their faces and laying hands on their friend. When we were finished praying I shared with my students what a pure image of God's love they showed to me, and whether we are seven, twenty-seven or fifty-seven, this is how Jesus wants us to respond when a friend is hurting. A love with no reservations.
     Then to top this moment off, I looked over at one of my girls and asked her what she was feeling, she stated so simply, "I feel like I want to cry, because I know Jesus is inside me." Uh, yeah, speechless.

It is amazing how the things you expect the least from, teach you the most important lessons.